I’ve always found it to be a struggle to fit into groups and environments; I’ve either been told I’m too quiet and shy or that I’m too loud and obnoxious. Elementary and middle school were defined by how lonely I was. I was part of many friend groups where I found myself masking who I was to fit into other people’s standards, but something that remained true to me has always been my writing and my humor. 

Around the beginning of seventh grade, I started making more friends based on the humor I started to obtain from niche and obscure little videos in a very distinct corner of YouTube. It went stagnant once Covid-19 happened near the end of that school year. 

I barely had anyone to talk to during quarantine, as I could never hang out with people outside of school. I lost most, if not all the relationships I had made and my social skills. I became an even shyer introvert than I was before. 

But I later discovered my growing interest for writing in my freshman year English class, where I started to look forward to the essay portions of assignments and tests. Some might call me a nerd, but I love to read and write. It’s who I am at heart. 

In my sophomore year of high school, I found myself pondering on all the course options I could pick from. Two courses that stood out to me were “Graphic Design I” and “Commercial Photography I.” What I didn’t know was that those two classes were part of the yearbook curriculum. 

I didn’t find that out until the summer of my junior year when my friend asked me why I had joined yearbook. I was told by my teacher and advisor, Justin Stene, to wait it out for a week to see if it was something I would like to get into. And so, I did. 

This was the first time I ever found myself truly welcomed and felt like myself around people. I had joined the yearbook club, and I constantly signed up to photograph events and started to become more involved with the work and the staff altogether. 

 As the school year continued, I learned that I loved being able to tell stories in a whole new fashion, whether it was photography or writing. I learned what it felt like to be able to find a passion for something. 

The relationships I was able to build with my peers and fellow staff members will always be something I will cherish in my heart. While some people were calling me cringe and weird, I became closer to my friends because of how just how “weird” I was. 

I even found someone who would get all my niche references from TikTok videos, Nate, who is also a staff photographer at The Prospector. And the said friend from summer, Erick, who is also a photographer here, became my boyfriend and my best friend. 

The previous Prospector staff members would come into our classroom to give us presentations on the organization, and I remember thinking “This is cool and all, but I don’t think I could ever join this.” I was already stressed out enough with yearbook as it was, and I scared myself by thinking it would be a lot more work than I had at the time.

Summer after graduation, I was relieved to be free from the world of yearbook, all that stress was finally behind me. Then two weeks before starting my first semester of college, my now editor-in-chief, Evelyn reached out to me asking if I would like to apply for the arts & culture editor position.

I was terrified, I remember freaking out to my best friends and boyfriend, asking them what I should do. Imagine my shock when I found them all telling me to take it because they knew it was something I enjoyed.

Despite the fear I had of being in a completely different environment, I pushed myself to go for it and I’m glad I did. It didn’t take me long to get comfortable with everyone, especially because there were some familiar faces among the staff.

The title I have held since my junior year of high school of being chronically online has now been passed onto my time here at The Prospector. You can always catch me laughing at a silly video when I am alone in the office. But it has been what made me become better friends with my fellow editors.

Shoutout Iziah, Kahri, Kristian and Ximena for understanding the references I make on a daily basis.

Throughout my journey through the journalism realm, I still feel I have a long way to go for learning and growing. And yet, I have been able to get the best opportunities to write about some things I never thought I could write about.

And I owe it all to Evelyn for believing in me to be the final piece in her staff at her final semester here at The University of Texas at El Paso and The Prospector.

Thank you for believing in me and giving me the best first semester of college I could have ever asked for.

Abigail Pedroza is the arts & culture editor for The Prospector and may be reached at [email protected]