Social media: the relationship killer

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Social media: the relationship killer

Elenie Gonzalez, Staff Reporter

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Social media has been ingrained in our lives for the past decade and it’s not going away anytime soon.

There are the few and strong who choose not to get involved with social media, but for the most part everyone else has at least one account with Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, Snapchat, or all four. Each one can be used differently, but mainly we feel the need to share everything that is happening in our lives—the good, the bad and the ugly.

As far as our personal relationships go, that is also something that many people love to share. This is where it gets tricky though.

Think about all the times social media has created problems in our relationships, whether it’s a new one or one you’ve been in for a while. Let’s start with Facebook.

On Facebook, you have the option to indicate that you are single, in a relationship, engaged, married, divorced and you even have the option to say “it’s complicated.” Users also have the choice to hide their relationship status if they choose to. I’ve seen it all with my friends and I’ve participated in this as well.

We often make a big deal out of all of these options too. How many times have you asked your friends if they are Facebook official with their new boo? That usually means that it’s serious business.

What about if someone chooses not to display their relationship status? Does that mean that it’s not serious or that they’re not happy or that they’re wanting to appear like they’re single? I think the answers can be yes and no depending on the person. This also comes with problems of its own.

If someone appears single because they hide their status, but they’re not single, then it’s easy for others to hit them up. At the same time, if someone is “in a relationship,” it doesn’t always prevent others from sliding into the DMs (Direct Messages).

There are also couples who love to share pictures of themselves every chance they get, and every profile pic or Instagram post is of them looking cute. Honestly, sometimes this screams insecurities to me, like they’re trying to prove something to the world. 

I’m not trying to hate on those who do this because I’m sure it’s not always like that. But what happens when said couple suddenly goes back to putting only themselves in a profile picture? Does that mean the relationship is going south? Not necessarily, but sometimes it is and this is where the complications continue to arise. This is when friends and followers begin to assume things that may or may not be true. This is when social media begins to kill a relationship.

Here’s another idea. When it comes to likes, think about how many times this can create issues. If you see your significant other liking another person’s posts and tweets and selfies a little too much, don’t you assume that something must be going on there even if there’s not? Sometimes “liking” someone’s post can be a small way of flirtation don’t you think? Not always, but some may think so. I’ve had those thoughts before.

The bottom line is that all social media can create many different types of issues. This is why many people I know choose not to have any form of social media. They tell me that it is distracting and don’t want to make their life complicated by participating in it. They would rather be low-key in their life and their relationships, which I applaud.

I’m not trying to be a negative Nancy here because I love social media myself. I’ve been the person who shares everything and I’ve been the person who shares nothing.

If you are in love and want to shout it from the rooftops, then go for it. People love happiness and people love love. If you’re not in a relationship and want to shout that out too because you’re happy and love yourself, then please do it. Healthy love is something to be proud of, whether it’s for yourself or another person. Don’t let social media kill it for you.

Follow Elenie Gonzalez on Twitter @eleniegonz

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