Student virgins fight pressure to save themselves for marriage

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Michaela Roman

Two students talk in between classes. They are not affiliated with the story.

Ben Woolridge, Staff Reporter

Many college students across the country may engage in the popular practice of having sex without committing to a relationship, but a significant number of others commit to remaining virgins until marriage.

Lucas Galey, biomedical engineering graduate student, said he has chosen to abstain from sex as part of God’s plan for his life.

“It’s such an intimate personal act. It’s something I’ve decided to save until marriage so that I can share it with that one person,” Galey said. “To me, marriage is a contract for life.”

The word virgin may evoke memories of a bygone America, where traditional attitudes concerning sex might now be considered antiquated.

America’s Sexual Revolution during the 1960s marked a clear departure of the more rigid sexual norms that were still present a decade prior and helped to remove some of the negative connotations associated with having sex for the sake of pleasure.

“Life nowadays in society, movies—everything is sex, sex, sex,” Galey said. “Society is like ‘this is the best thing. You need to try it now.’”

Galey said he has seen how relationships based solely on sex end with people’s hearts being broken.

“That shows to me that it’s more than just a physical thing. It’s really a deep emotional connection,” he said.

College students choosing to remain virgins, like Galey, may not be that few in numbers.

Dr. Kathleen Bogle, assistant professor in sociology and criminal justice  at La Salle University, said the rate of virginity is actually higher on college campuses than students may believe.

She said that at least one in four college students are virgins.

Alejandro Tafoya, senior biological sciences major, is a virgin and wants to wait until marriage because of his Christian upbringing. However, he said he does feel the pressure.

“It’s definitely hard to wait. Our society is full of sex everywhere,” Tafoya said. “Hopefully, God willing, I’m able to make it.”

Galey said he is not easily influenced by peer pressure.

“There is a lot of pressure, but to me it’s just like, okay, it’s not worth it unless I decide that it’s worth it,” he said. “Society really wants you to want it.”

Tafoya said that remaining a virgin until marriage is a personal choice and he encourages others to be abstinent.

“I think what I’m doing is worth it,” Tafoya said. “It’s not too late.”

When asked about others not sharing the same views on virginity and marriage, Galey said he becomes upset. He said that he has done bad things, too, and he tries not to judge others.

“It bugs me sometimes,” Galey said. “We’re not told to keep other people’s pasts in mind, as Christians. We’re told to love people.”

Although times have changed,  Galey stands by his choice to remain a virgin for his future wife.

“That’s our special thing. No one can get in between that,” he said.

For Tafoya, the reason for remaining a virgin until marriage is clear.

“I want it to be special and I want it to be worth it,” Tafoya said.

Ben Woolridge may be reached at [email protected]